All letters – Page 2 – BERTHA BALLOU LETTERS

I tried to convert him to woman’s suffrage and I don’t think he wanted to be converted

To Cora Hendricks from Bertha – February 23, 1913

[Note: Bertha’s letter is written immediately following the “The Ten Tragic Days” – a series of events that took place in Mexico City between February 9 and February 19, 1913, during the Mexican Revolution. This lead up to a coup d’état and the assassination of President Francisco Madero. The US government reacted strongly, and its intervention is credited with paving the way for increasing Mexican nationalism.]

Mrs. C.C. Ballou
Camp McGrath, Batangas
Philippine Islands

Dear Mamma,

I imagine great excitement is reigning at Leavenworth today. The _____ left last night for Galveston so I _____ the paper this morning. The 19th is to go to the hospital company and the signal company and just about everything else. Just think, if Papa hadn’t had to go to the Islands, he would have to go into camp down in Galveston indefinitely with a possibly of being sent on into Mexico. They are hoping for the best here now though, and I think it is great that we have as conservative of a man as _____ to hold us off. It may not prove to be the best _____ but it meets with my approval at present anyway. I believe nothing further has been done about 1st Division. Bowd is probably just where he was and the news this morning said that the 13th Calvary would remain with headquarters at Bliss to patrol the border. This is rather as I had expected for it didn’t seem reasonable that they would move the troop engaged in guarding the border and besides they can gather them quickly if need be. I’m wondering if it was cheapness of transportation, the calmer aspect of afraid that determine the government to send the 5th Division instead of the 1st.

We are still having most peculiar weather, a slight thunder, storm last night. The cook got drunk Friday night and we had a hilarious dinner but since she was discharged, the food has been excellent, which is lucky because I’m now sitting at the housekeeper’s table and can’t complain with as much satisfaction to myself and little offence to others and either to. I haven’t seen or heard from a soul lately except a few lines and a clipping from Mr. Godfrey last week. You know, he was down here one Saturday and I tried to convert him to woman’s suffrage and I don’t think he wanted to be converted. In fact, I really tried hard to shock him than to convert him, which was very tactless of me. Hence I fully expected that I had seen my last of him. He is too polite to be rude and insists that he is seeing things in a modified light but I do wish the English subjects would quiet down. They have chosen an inappropriate movement to be exceedingly rampant and I’m very much ashamed of them for I don’t think woman need a vote that badly and I don’t approve of suffrage as a movement of woman against men because when it is considered as a same proposition of the best men though, of course not as interested as women, are nevertheless in favor of their having the vote and are in every way devoted to women’s interests. [Note: Women’s suffrage would be enshrined in the US Constitution seven years later – in 1920.]

Since I began writing, Mrs. Guthrie’s fiend, Miss Eilers, has called and I have accepted an invitation to undertaking going over to Brooklyn but I can’t with Mrs. _____ and go to the opera afterwards tomorrow evening. I hope it doesn’t rain because Miss Eilers tell me that Mrs. Guthrie has a new little on, Belly. Isn’t that lovely? I didn’t know anything about it. I must write to her this afternoon to congratulate her.

I must write to Francis Newcomer too. [Note: Read more about Newcomer, who would become Governor of the Panama Canal Zone, here.] I haven’t heard from him in so long that we are quite strangers. Not since Christmas. I guess he’s busy and I know I am. I’m planning to run up to W.P. for the day when the excursions start, the river boats, in the spring. I want to take another _____ around before leaving this part of the country. I’ve nearly finished a waist I have been working on. I’m so glad because it makes it easier for me to sew them when things get finished almost without realizing it. Evelyn Hope and I are going to a lecture tonight. [Note: Read a letter from Evelyn Hope here] I am so busy these days that I can hardly turn around, work progressed much better last week. I had a very favorable criticism from Mr. Drummond in which he said he was expecting me to do something very good. That helps. Now I must close as I have lots more to do this evening.

Love to all.

From,
Bertha

Last night, Nell sent me home with a bag of tangerines and oranges

To Cora Hendricks from Bertha – March 2, 1913

Dear Mamma,

I just came back from a ______ to Miss Eilers in Brooklyn and had a delightful time and was most cordially welcomed. Nobody could have been nicer than they were to me. There were a lot of the about five daughters more or less and an older mother and father who will soon celebrate their golden wedding. The father is a gunman and is perfectly lovely. There was evidence of plenty about their old fashioned house and I should say on the whole it is the most luxurious-rich-man’s-sort-of-home I have ever been in. Everything was handsome and spacious. The old lady was huge and German _____ and dressed in black ______ with a sufficient but not over-decoration with pearls and diamonds in the shape of rings, bracelets, etcetera. The daughters were middle age women, all plainly and handsomely dressed. I had a fine time and was taken from the subway for a drive in one of the best looking limousine I ever saw. One of the ladies is an artist and I was very much interested in her pictures.

Anyway, they were all lovely to me and asked me to come often and kissed goodbye which is funny because Mrs. Guthrie and I were not particularly in kissing terms. Well, marvels will never cease and I try to adapt myself to conditions as much as I can. Tomorrow I’m going to have a letter from you I think and I can hardly wait. Last night I went out to see Nell and had supper, such a good one that I was sick after it. We had a thoroughly good time. When I got back, I found a letter from Francis Newcomer. [Note: Read more about Newcomer, who would become Governor of the Panama Canal Zone, here.] He is feeling sad over an inauguration parade which will relieve him from almost no classes at all. His first bit of uniform are being tried on and he has been informed by the instructor in Engineering that this time next year, he will be a first lieutenant which is quite cheering to him. I will also give quite a jump to come other Engineer friends if they have a large increase. His mother is in the hospital again and I must write to her right away though I haven’t time this afternoon, seeing rather for it must be after eight. I feel quite happy and restless tonight, more so than I have lately thought I’ve been having a good time right along. I guess it’s the effect of having been in a town where trees grow and among cordial people who have known somebody I have known. Also, I hope it’s a cheerful promotion that I am going to get some mail tomorrow. I’ve got to mail the _____ Guthrie a little cap a something when I have time. I am also engaged on a _____ _____ ought to be pretty if I ever get it together right now to undo all I have done. It would also be serviceable I think as it is a rather dark colored crepe. It’s hard to do all the things I want to do and read too.

I’m now reading “Venting on the Plains” by Mrs. Custer. Not a work of art but of considerable interest as a picture of the times through woman’s eyes. Also I’m reading the “Blue Bird” by Maeterlinck and have just finished Blackmore’s “Maid of Sker” which is not nearly as good a “Soma Doone.” I tried to read Boswell’s “Life of Johnson” but found it didn’t hold my attention and while I don’t read any trash at all to amount to anything, I am too busy to make myself read anything that doesn’t interest me. Perhaps I’ll grow up to Boswell by and by but in the meanwhile, there are lots of good books that I like to read better. It has turned a lot colder today and seems quite wintery again. I suppose it will keep on doin that for a long time yet.

Last night, Nell sent me home with a bag of tangerines and oranges, sent from Florida by her uncle, there was two girls in my room when I arrived, I gave my tangerine to a girl in the stairs, and the girls in my room ate respectively two and three tangerines and an orange each and I ate a tangerine. There now remains one orange which I think two of us will devour shortly as I see Evelyn Hope has refrained from it while I’ve been gone all day. Well, I hate quantities of her good southern pecans at Christmas time which I like better than oranges so I shall no resent her having the lions’ share this time. One thing I have to be thankful for.

The year has not yet ended but I have gone through five months of it without its lessening my friendship and respect for my roommates and after last year this seems a vision of harmony. Also I do not suffer from insomnia and my nerves are a negligible vanity. This time last year, I thought I was nearly made of nerves. Insomnia and nerves seem to be very closely associated. I never lose sleep when my nerves are all night and my digestion. I guess I told you we’ve been having a good cork. She’s going to leave but for the time being, things have been much better. Now, I must say goodnight as I have clothes to put in _____ and a diary to write into before I go to bed.

Love to all.
From,
Bertha

March 2nd, 1913

A rather nice young doctor whom I met on Sunday called last night

To Cora Hendricks from Bertha – March 5, 1913

Dear Mamma,

I got two letters from you Monday morning. They were a trifle old in this news of cause but I was enjoyed to get them. I had forgotten I had a sore foot. That is a think of the past. Also, I was sorry to find that I had failed to acknowledge the receipt of that first check from Papa. I suppose I got busy writing and forgot the most important think I had to say as usual. Anyway, in case I’ve forgotten some other time, let me say now that I have received all the checks sent, I am sure of that, the last being sent since your arrival in the Islands but I’m sure I wrote Papa about that one.

Concerning staying here another year, it’s a pretty serious matter to decide in some ways I think and I hardly know what to say. My work has not been as uniformly satisfactory as I would have wished and I realize more and more that there are so many promising students in this world that being one doesn’t necessarily guarantee anything. Well, it’s a question so serious that I’m afraid to decide it. I’d much rather let things take their natural course though I suppose one must come to decisions once in a while. I’d gladly stay if I could get five or six additional months without staying longer than that time but the best time of the year here is from December on, which means a whole year longer without seeing you. That seems a very long time to me.

I will get Reba’s _____ cloth and whatever else you want for yourself and thank you very much in advance for my birthday gift. I’ve already tried to think what I will do with it. I’d like books but they are heavy to put in my trunk and will perhaps not be the wisest choice at the present time. On the whole as I’d like to put the money into something permanent I rather imagine I will settle on a silver card case as that will be something I will always be glad to have and can always make use of. I judge that Miss McCoy is the only girl on the post. She is certainly very unfortunate and as you say, it makes me feel my own blessing to see a person so afflicted. I will miss not having more girls but after all, we will have a lot of fun by ourselves. Senn [Note: Her brother] has left home by this time. I hope he will do well at his new school. I am making a little cap for baby Guthrie. Do you know I find that lots of things that I used to think terribly hard have found so easy. I used to think hemstitching hard was accordingly have not done any in years and have vastly admired people who hemstitched, that’s hemstitch I think on the whole, who hemstitched handkerchiefs but now I find that I can do it very quickly and neatly having been forced to try again.

I want very much to have Captain and Mrs. Guthrie for real, permanent friends. It’s queer how some people appeal so much more than others and I feel it particularly in this case since I have met their friends, the Eilers, their friends speak for them and a more wholly cordial and delightfully welcome. I can’t imagine them from any family to a complete stranger. I called Mrs. May yesterday but she had a headache unfortunately so only saw her cousin, Miss Mann. They are going south in a few days but will not be there very long I imagine.

A rather nice young doctor whom I met on Sunday called last night. He seems very pleasant but I’m half inclined to think I will not be at home the next time he calls if he does again for I have a very queer feeling about knowing men whom I don’t meet at home even when they are introduced by lady people. I suppose it’s rather absurd and I ought not to cultivate it.

I have not heard from Mr. Godfrey in some time. I’m sorry to say as he also made a little impression at the Studio Club though not as great a one as Mr. Loughborough. Mr. Godfrey’s ideas are very peculiar on some subjects particularly including women I think and I’m much too matter of fact to interest him. To him, a woman is cobwebby, ethereal creature of dreams. I don’t think he has met many of that kind but I imagine he thinks even I am to him like the heroine of an ultra-sentimental story, so he says, another little “Weaver of Dreams,” not me but Mr. Godfrey, I’m the “Very Tired Girl” who was an artist and lived in New York. I’m going to try to live up to it if I can resist this temptation to tease him, always pondering he ever turns up again which doesn’t seem highly probably considering. Well, the discussion of a play to be given in the spring is coming up again and as it’s being discussed in my room and I’ll have to stop.

Love to all.

The discussion is over so I’ll write a little more. Mrs. Newcomer has been again, is still in the hospital in Chicago and Colonel Newcomer is with her. I must write to her very soon, tonight if I have time and I think I’ll try to make her a little Easter gift after I finish with Billy Guthrie, if I have time. Oh, lady! She has been having a very hard time and Francis writes to her every night which is one reason why I have only heard from him once since Christmas. Work is better again this week. I believe I’m really picking up again though it’s a little soon to feel elated. I worked awfully hard today and quite enjoyed doing it. I’ve found a certain spot ______ the lighting attracts me and there I intend to stick if possible until I get my work really well in hard. I like doing portraits and I’m sure it is my real field if I have any because it is what I have always wanted to do more than anything else. We have a laughing model this week and she is intensely interesting. I hope very much that I will get a D as I did on my last week’s portrait which was a better likeness, I think.

Love to all.

From,
Bertha

Servants seem quite reasonable at Batangas

To C.C. Ballou from Bertha – March 9, 1913

[Note: Bertha is 23 and an art student in New York]

Dear Papa,

I received your letter and the check Wednesday. It was quite a surprise to me as I didn’t know a mail was coming through and I usually keep track of the mail pretty well. I was very sorry indeed to learn of Mrs. Maxwell’s death for I know that you must feel it very greatly and I know that you did care a great deal for her. She must have been a very lovely old lady and will be missed a great deal but what a wonderful thing it is that she could have kept her keen interest in everything and her enjoyment of life right up to the very last in spite of many years.

I judge that I must have written mamma something along the general uselessness of being an artist. I don’t know why I feel that way at times because realizing that that is not nearly all I gain in New York and that I am learning many other things and having opportunities I will never have anywhere else, I still do think painting of great importance in a way. It is a mode of expression and education and gaining a living. As this includes almost everything that people strive for in this word it ought to be worth working for and it is not to be expected every individual will be the most successful in this line any more than that every grocer will end a millionaire. I’ve never felt any more wonderful sensation than that of drawing and knowing that I could do it well. The feeling of having produced something. I imagine it is something the same when an engineer finishes a bridge and an architect designs a building. Someday I hope to realize the same exultation in paint. I am not a genius at all but thus far I have always made steady progress and I hope in the end to do something worthwhile.

I don’t really think I want to stay here another year though I surely appreciate a father who is willing to do so much for me. The work would be good for me, no doubt, but I hate to be so far from you and mamma. Perhaps I might stay on a month a ______ longer for summer school if you approve. However I really think I’d be glad to have you and mamma give your opinion. It’s a privilege to decide things for one’s self, I know, but it’s rather a hard one at times. There are always things on both sides of the question. If you were in this country I think I would be very glad to study at the League another year – but after all the goal is always very far off and another year would find me still a student as perhaps I had better for my work as well as other things, stop now and try what I can do at home.

This afternoon a few of the art students were going to take some factory girls up to the museum but the factory girls didn’t materialize so after sitting around in hat and gloves for an hour, I came upstairs and undressed. It must now be nearly time for my Sunday afternoon lecture as I must put them on again. Our Sunday talks are not very interesting as a rule but I rather liked the woman who is going to speak this afternoon and as it’s a fine day, I’m afraid she will not have much of an audience.

Both my roommates are out this afternoon which makes this a fine opportunity for me to write. I gave your regard to Mrs. _____ and Miss Newman. Both send very best regards to you. Mamma wrote that you were going away for about a month so I suppose you are on _____. I suppose you will have another uncomfortable time but hope it is over by now. Servants seem quite reasonable at Batangas, more so, I should judge, than at Ms. Kinley, though I’ve forgotten how much we paid there.

Later…

I had an off little experience this afternoon after the meeting. A lady called to see Evelyn Hope, my roommate, and as she was out, I went up and introduced myself and kept her the three-quarters of an hour that elapsed before Evelyn Hope turned up. Then she only stayed a few more minutes and very kindly included me in an invitation to dinner sometime soon, which we accepted. As I was saying goodbye to Miss Newman, it dawned on me for the first time that this Mrs. Porter was the wife of O. Henry, the author. I was particularly interested to meet her as I have enjoyed some of his stories very much and I will be very glad to know her better.

Well, now I must close as I have just remembered that I must telephone Nell Babbitt tonight.

Love to all.

From,

Specks

I believe I will make a portrait painter yet

To both parents from Bertha – March, 1913 (Approx.)

Dear Mamma and Papa,

I have a fate pursuing me into all sorts of queer experiences. Tonight I have been at the first reading of a play under the instruction of a professional actor and with three or four professionals in a cast of eight. I am a young man in a morality play to be given for the benefit of the club on April 17th and we expect to have a neat theater. I feel very odd indeed and hardly know how I will speak even my few lines but as the honor was thrust upon me, I will do my best and be thoughtful that the part is short. It is interesting to work with the others who are doing the big parts because they are real actresses though still studying. I am now practicing laughing. This is difficult to me inexperienced but Mr. Nath assures me it is perfectly simple.

I spoke to Mr. Drummond this morning about summer school. He will probably teach at _____, about two hours from here, but is engaged in some big mural decorations and so busy he can’t be sure whether he has time and teach. There is always a summer school at Woodstock. I have about made up my mind that I might go to summer school for a month or two anyway to get a little start at landscape. I have seen some of the work of students after a summer course that was very good, students who had only studied last year at the League and then gone to summer school with a year less preparation than I have now so I believe there is a lot to be had from it. Also two months at this end of the year when I am right in the work is worth four at the beginning after a vacation. I believe it would be a great help to me in working alone on landscape as I will have to do a good deal, from lack of models, if I could have a little start to get me through the most discouraging part of learning to paint with an _______ palette.
As you have suggested my staying another year if I thought best, I take it almost for granted that you will not object to my putting in a little while longer right now and then coming to you a few months later at the most. I am going to plan to stay a month at summer school anyway and make my arrangements accordingly, since I can’t hear from you immediately. I will receive an answer to this probably about the end of May which if I am not here will be immediately forwarded by Miss Newman to _____ or Woodstock and if you don’t want me to stay, will still have time to catch the July transport if you think best. I wish when you write you would tell me exactly what you think and when you want me to come. I don’t like to be long way from you and in a way, I had to put off my departure even a month because I hate delays and like to do things when I have said I would and of course I want to go home but on the other hand as far as I can see, from my present artwork, it seems a very little matter to add two or three months at the outside to my years’ work and I can see how much of a start I might to get in that time.

I will inquire into the matter of expense but do not believe it will be more expensive than here through I will have some tuition to pay and of course they always stick artist _____ in the matter of board even in the Coventry. I supposed board will be six or seven dollars a week but hope to take Evelyn Hope as a romantic so it might be less. Traveling expenses to and from will be slight as Mr. Drummond makes the trip in twice a week during the spring and fall to give criticisms. It is evidently a very short distance.

Work is going about as usual. I had a pretty good portrait this week and had another D. It was also a fair likeness. Next week, I intend to have another D, if possible, and a better portrait. Drawing is so easy for me that I get likeness much more readily than most in the class even of the advanced students. It is a great satisfaction to me and I believe I will make a portrait painter yet. It is a think I can gain a great deal in by myself I believe, though of course it goes slowly. I am gradually growing used to working in paint and I think after a while I would learn to forget about the ways and means and then I would do better character work. Now I have adopted a plan which seems small in a way but is giving me confidence. I chose a position in the room that interested me with a given model and made a much better portrait than usual, managing to grasp the big features of shadow masses for the first time. The next week the model was posed in much the same place and the same general masses held good. I chose almost identically the same place and did very much better as I understood the lighting pretty well. This week I tried it again. Next week if possible, I will use the same position and then if I feel thoroughly able to cope with the situation there, I will move with a great deal more confidence to a new spot and go at the problem from a new point of view. In the meantime, I have gained a great deal more confidence so I believe my idea has been worthwhile. I expect a letter from you tomorrow so I will write more later.

Your letter was quite shorthand so there is not much to answer. I hope you got the letter you were expecting from me. My roommates say I don’t do anything else but write home but I realized that that was hardly exact. I went last night to hear Faust a second time. It was Saturday night and standing room is only a dollar. I thought Faust was worth a dollar so I went again. Favrar and Gilly sang. Favrar was not as good as Destin whom I heard before but her acting was better as she looks the part. I like Faust better than any other opera I have heard. It is perfectly wonderful. Now I must close as my hair is wet and drippy and this has to go in the morning.

Love from Bertha

P.S. I guess I only want to stay a month longer.